We had a Detroit Tigers baseball player and a Dark Knight batman at our house this Halloween.
1 year ago
Monday, October 31, 2011
Happy Halloween
Sunday, October 30, 2011
beautiful day for pictures
Here's my attempt at capturing the boys at ages 3 1/2 and 2. I borrowed my sisters camera and tried my hand at being a photographer. Not too shabby for my first time.
Friday, October 21, 2011
leaves
After Thomas and the boys went to the pumpkin patch they came home and played outside for awhile.
Monday, October 17, 2011
Sunday, October 16, 2011
two little helpers
This week the boys and I have been trying out a few different recipes that I found on Pinterest. (Must say I have fallen in love with this website. Yes, I know, I believe this site has been around for awhile, but hey with two small kids running around I'm not really hip or trendy anymore... or maybe I never was hip and trendy.)
Garrison and I took a try at making bath paints one afternoon while Josiah was taking his nap. (Garrison is suppose to lay down or play quietly in his room at the same time that Josiah sleeps, but this week he wasn't having any of it and I was beyond frustrated so I had to get creative.) Making bath paints is super easy and the boys had a blast the other night using it in the bath tub. They would have spent hours in the tub playing with this stuff if I would have let them.
Our final product.
Garrison and I took a try at making bath paints one afternoon while Josiah was taking his nap. (Garrison is suppose to lay down or play quietly in his room at the same time that Josiah sleeps, but this week he wasn't having any of it and I was beyond frustrated so I had to get creative.) Making bath paints is super easy and the boys had a blast the other night using it in the bath tub. They would have spent hours in the tub playing with this stuff if I would have let them.
Garrison helping me stir the bubble bath and cornstarch together.
Bubble bath paints
1 c. of baby bubble bath or body wash (make sure it's clear or white)
4 tbsp cornstarch
a few drops of food coloring
small containers with lids
Mix baby bubble bath and cornstarch together. Separate into the four containers. Add food coloring.
Let the kids have a blast with paint brushes or their fingers.
* I had very little baby bubble bath left so I used hand soap instead. Worked out perfect!
Our final product.
Then I decided to tackle a cookie recipe that I knew would take up our entire afternoon and probably drive me bonkers trying to make them with two small boys. Doesn't every mother need to try out a crazy adventure at least once while the kids are small? Our adventure turned out really well. We all had fun and the cookies are the BEST. Let me tell you. You need to make these babies. They are knock offs of the Girl Scout cookies Caramel De-lites, which are my absolute favorite.
Click here to get the recipe. For real- they are so good!
The boys helping me unwrap caramels. Garrison has one in his cheek and yes, I only allowed them to have one caramel while they unwrapped. I know, I'm such a mean mom- only one. Garrison is wearing the same shirt as in the picture above, but we did both of the projects in one day.
Friday, September 30, 2011
I miss you
I want to talk about this, but yet I don't. I want to share better news, but yet I can't. I want to sit and cry in my bed all day, but I have a family to take care of. I want to still be pregnant, but I'm not.
I was planning to share some wonderful news with everyone in a couple of weeks. I had an idea of how I was going to tell people. I had known I was pregnant fairly early. We had already told our families and were just waiting until the 12 week mark to tell everyone else. But now I will share my heartbreak, which is still fresh and new and painful. My words may not make sense. My mind may be scattered. My heart may be completely broken. But my God is bigger and will help me and the rest of my family get through this.
I was 9 1/2 weeks pregnant. I went into the doctor on September 7th for my first prenatal appointment. It started out as normal. They took my weight, blood pressure and gave me a "goodie" bag of all the fun magazines and a pamphlet of what to expect during your pregnancy. I talked with the nurse practitioner about how I was feeling and my previous pregnancies. Then I was given an ultrasound to determine my exact due date.
According to all the dates, at that time, the baby should have been an 8 1/2 week old fetus, but the ultrasound showed it was only a 6 1/2 week old fetus. The nurse practitioner told me that it was ok and maybe our dates were off or I got pregnant later than the "calendar" said I should have. However, we saw a heartbeat or something "pulsating" (the nurses word) on the screen. She went and talked with my doctor and they decided they wanted me to come in the following week to see an ultrasound tech just to make sure everything was ok and to ease my mind a little.
Friday afternoon (September 16) I went into to see the ultrasound tech. She asked me some routine questions and then proceeded with the ultrasound. She turned the screen away from me right away and I knew that wasn't a good sign. She did a lot of clicking and looking and clicking some more. I watched her face for a while for some kind of response, but there was none. I knew in my heart what the answer was going to be anyway. I didn't want to start bawling on the table so I started to look around the room and pray for everything to be ok.
I prayed a lot last week. I prayed that God would take care of the baby and prepare me for whatever the outcome was. I thanked him for already knowing the outcome and for having everything under control. Even though I felt very much out of control.
After clicking and looking she said she was going to turn on the doppler for a moment. Pure static. No noise of a heartbeat, no wavy lines across the screen. Flat line static. Then the tears started falling. I wanted to wake up from my horrible nightmare. I wanted to see what was happening. I wanted to say good-bye. I wanted to go home and cry and hold my boys and tell them I loved them. Sometimes I feel like I'm overreacting. Sometimes I feel stupid for not knowing that I wasn't pregnant anymore. I know that miscarriages happen often. My doctor told me 20% of pregnancy end in a miscarriage, but those are other people, not me.
She eventually turned the screen so I could see and she could explain to me what she was seeing. She saw no activity of a baby. No more blood flow, no more movement, no more heartbeat. She was very caring and told me in as nice of words as she could find that my body had and was prepared for a baby, but the baby just didn't make it and she was sorry to be the bearer of bad news. I said I understood and would be ok. She was very kind and told me I could stay as long as needed and when I was finished I could go sit in the lobby and wait for them to come get me so I could talk to my doctor.
I didn't want to go sit in the lobby. Everyone would be staring at me and my bright red, bloodshot eyes and my blotchy skin. But I pulled myself together and went and sat in the lobby, but as soon as my butt hit the chair the ultrasound tech called me back into her office and let me sit in there so I could have some privacy. I was so thankful because I was already getting lots of stares.
My doctor came in a few minutes later and told me what to expect. I know it's not easy to tell someone that they lost a baby and I was very thankful to both the ultrasound lady and my doctor for any information they could give me. I know it's their job and they probably do it often, but this was my first and I'm thankful for the way they explained things and let me know what to expect.
As soon as I was done I left as fast as I could. By this time I just wanted to be in the comfort of my home. Thomas had been at soccer practice and wanted me to text him right away with the results. The hardest text I've ever written was "we lost the baby." I didn't want to hit send. That would make it real. We'd been looking through baby name books and had told our families. I didn't want to say it was over. But I sent it and then started the texts to everyone else. We lost our baby. He or she was now in heaven. God was holding them now and I would have to wait my turn.
Arriving home was tough. To see my boys playing and having fun knowing that I will never get to see that from this baby. I hugged my boys and cried. I'm sure they were wondering what in the world was wrong with me. Garrison did ask why I was crying and all I said was I was sad. That was good enough for him. He just hugged me back.
I know I'll be ok. I know God has us in his arms, but for now I hurt. We hurt.
__________________________
I wrote this days after finding out we had lost our baby. It has been two weeks now and I am okay. The weekend after we found out we lost the baby was a crazy one. We had lots of activities and I over did it a little, but God showed me and is still showing me that he is in control. Looking back I can see many ways he prepared me for the loss even before I knew there was anything wrong. I've spent my fair share of crying and praying and I am at peace and have enormous comfort though our wonderful Savior.
Thomas and I have decided that we will remember our baby by framing the only picture we have of them- a little ultrasound picture of him or her at 6 1/2 wks when I was able to see them for the first time and saw that little heart beating away. (Thomas did not come with me to either appointment.)
I wish that I could meet our baby here on earth, but I love thinking that they are being taken care of by the greatest one- Jesus. He gets to hold them, kiss them and love on them now. And one day I'll be able to do the same and you better believe I'm going to be making up for lost time.
We didn't tell many people that we were pregnant or that we had lost them, but to everyone who knew - thank you for your calls, cards and prayers. They have meant the world to us. We are so blessed to have people who love us dearly and we love you all back.
I was planning to share some wonderful news with everyone in a couple of weeks. I had an idea of how I was going to tell people. I had known I was pregnant fairly early. We had already told our families and were just waiting until the 12 week mark to tell everyone else. But now I will share my heartbreak, which is still fresh and new and painful. My words may not make sense. My mind may be scattered. My heart may be completely broken. But my God is bigger and will help me and the rest of my family get through this.
I was 9 1/2 weeks pregnant. I went into the doctor on September 7th for my first prenatal appointment. It started out as normal. They took my weight, blood pressure and gave me a "goodie" bag of all the fun magazines and a pamphlet of what to expect during your pregnancy. I talked with the nurse practitioner about how I was feeling and my previous pregnancies. Then I was given an ultrasound to determine my exact due date.
According to all the dates, at that time, the baby should have been an 8 1/2 week old fetus, but the ultrasound showed it was only a 6 1/2 week old fetus. The nurse practitioner told me that it was ok and maybe our dates were off or I got pregnant later than the "calendar" said I should have. However, we saw a heartbeat or something "pulsating" (the nurses word) on the screen. She went and talked with my doctor and they decided they wanted me to come in the following week to see an ultrasound tech just to make sure everything was ok and to ease my mind a little.
Friday afternoon (September 16) I went into to see the ultrasound tech. She asked me some routine questions and then proceeded with the ultrasound. She turned the screen away from me right away and I knew that wasn't a good sign. She did a lot of clicking and looking and clicking some more. I watched her face for a while for some kind of response, but there was none. I knew in my heart what the answer was going to be anyway. I didn't want to start bawling on the table so I started to look around the room and pray for everything to be ok.
I prayed a lot last week. I prayed that God would take care of the baby and prepare me for whatever the outcome was. I thanked him for already knowing the outcome and for having everything under control. Even though I felt very much out of control.
After clicking and looking she said she was going to turn on the doppler for a moment. Pure static. No noise of a heartbeat, no wavy lines across the screen. Flat line static. Then the tears started falling. I wanted to wake up from my horrible nightmare. I wanted to see what was happening. I wanted to say good-bye. I wanted to go home and cry and hold my boys and tell them I loved them. Sometimes I feel like I'm overreacting. Sometimes I feel stupid for not knowing that I wasn't pregnant anymore. I know that miscarriages happen often. My doctor told me 20% of pregnancy end in a miscarriage, but those are other people, not me.
She eventually turned the screen so I could see and she could explain to me what she was seeing. She saw no activity of a baby. No more blood flow, no more movement, no more heartbeat. She was very caring and told me in as nice of words as she could find that my body had and was prepared for a baby, but the baby just didn't make it and she was sorry to be the bearer of bad news. I said I understood and would be ok. She was very kind and told me I could stay as long as needed and when I was finished I could go sit in the lobby and wait for them to come get me so I could talk to my doctor.
I didn't want to go sit in the lobby. Everyone would be staring at me and my bright red, bloodshot eyes and my blotchy skin. But I pulled myself together and went and sat in the lobby, but as soon as my butt hit the chair the ultrasound tech called me back into her office and let me sit in there so I could have some privacy. I was so thankful because I was already getting lots of stares.
My doctor came in a few minutes later and told me what to expect. I know it's not easy to tell someone that they lost a baby and I was very thankful to both the ultrasound lady and my doctor for any information they could give me. I know it's their job and they probably do it often, but this was my first and I'm thankful for the way they explained things and let me know what to expect.
As soon as I was done I left as fast as I could. By this time I just wanted to be in the comfort of my home. Thomas had been at soccer practice and wanted me to text him right away with the results. The hardest text I've ever written was "we lost the baby." I didn't want to hit send. That would make it real. We'd been looking through baby name books and had told our families. I didn't want to say it was over. But I sent it and then started the texts to everyone else. We lost our baby. He or she was now in heaven. God was holding them now and I would have to wait my turn.
Arriving home was tough. To see my boys playing and having fun knowing that I will never get to see that from this baby. I hugged my boys and cried. I'm sure they were wondering what in the world was wrong with me. Garrison did ask why I was crying and all I said was I was sad. That was good enough for him. He just hugged me back.
I know I'll be ok. I know God has us in his arms, but for now I hurt. We hurt.
__________________________
I wrote this days after finding out we had lost our baby. It has been two weeks now and I am okay. The weekend after we found out we lost the baby was a crazy one. We had lots of activities and I over did it a little, but God showed me and is still showing me that he is in control. Looking back I can see many ways he prepared me for the loss even before I knew there was anything wrong. I've spent my fair share of crying and praying and I am at peace and have enormous comfort though our wonderful Savior.
Thomas and I have decided that we will remember our baby by framing the only picture we have of them- a little ultrasound picture of him or her at 6 1/2 wks when I was able to see them for the first time and saw that little heart beating away. (Thomas did not come with me to either appointment.)
I wish that I could meet our baby here on earth, but I love thinking that they are being taken care of by the greatest one- Jesus. He gets to hold them, kiss them and love on them now. And one day I'll be able to do the same and you better believe I'm going to be making up for lost time.
We didn't tell many people that we were pregnant or that we had lost them, but to everyone who knew - thank you for your calls, cards and prayers. They have meant the world to us. We are so blessed to have people who love us dearly and we love you all back.
8 years is a long time
Last month my best friend from high school came for a visit. You remember, I hadn't seen her in 11 years. Well the other day I was able to see another friend that I haven't seen in 8 years.
I was actually on the phone, in my pajamas, (luckily I had showered) when my sister came running in to tell me that Melissa Neal was only a few blocks away and was wondering if she could stop by for a visit. Needless to say, I hung up the phone and started running around the house trying to prepare for a friend I hadn't seen in years.
She arrived with her beautiful children and her mom, Sue (who is one of my parents dear friends.) It was so nice to see them and catch up. Garrison and Josiah loved having all the kids around too. I forgot to introduce Garrison and Josiah to Melissa's kids. At one point I apologized to Garrison for not letting him know the kids' names that he was playing with. He said, "That's okay, mom. I've just been calling them my buddies." How cute is that!? Tonight I posted a picture on facebook of all the kids together and Garrison saw it and said, "Hey mom! Those are my buddies." Too bad we all didn't live closer to each other.
It was so nice to see Melissa, her kids and Sue. It was my first time meeting 3 of Melissa's kids. I really hope it's not another 8 years until I see them again.
Top - Kazia and Elijuah
Bottom- Symacus, Josiah, Garrison and Mijimin (I hope I spelled their names right.)
Aren't they all so stinkin' cute?!
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